There's something about loneliness that can bring out the Best or the Worst in you. You struggle to Survive the simplest moments. You watch others congregate, but your inclusion isn't common. You learn to care for yourself, because you know if you fall, there's literally Noone to help you stand. In hindsight this makes you a jack of all trades. You're upset because you have to do it all alone, but you do it, because it has to get done. It doesn't matter how big your community is, at the end of the day, It's YOU that keeps you afloat. You wonder, "Why me? What did I do to deserve this?", Why am I not invited? Why am I not included? What is wrong with me? But, staying in that mindset can be very depressing and detrimental. Loneliness can make you eager to do things for others, just to keep them around, feel seen, or accepted. You sell yourself short, put others above your needs and go out of your way to make others happy, but it's never reciprocated. This starts a never ending pattern of sadness. The saying "Do unto others, as you would have them do unto you", doesn't work in this scenario, because your others don't see you the way you want to be seen. You're only called upon when they need something of value and unfortunately many of us have taken this call, just to get a glimpse of inclusion. This is when we become our own worst Enemy. We have forgotten our strength and Values. It's not easy being alone. It's not easy feeling left out. We have to learn to find other avenues that provide healthy resources and relationships, because if we don't, the loneliness will continue to grow and depression comes to follow. A village begins with one person. Grow your own. It may not look exactly the way you pictured it, but it will sustain you.
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